đź’” When They Still Protect the Person Who Hurt You

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đź’” When They Still Protect the Person Who Hurt You

There’s a heartbreak that goes beyond the original harm. It’s the silence.The excuses.The polite smiles at family gatherings.The messages from mutual

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Are You Still Protecting People Who Never Protected You? 5 Powerful Questions to Break the Cycle
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There’s a heartbreak that goes beyond the original harm.

It’s the silence.
The excuses.
The polite smiles at family gatherings.
The messages from mutual friends that say, “It’s time to move on,” or worse, “But they’ve changed.”

It’s watching the people who were supposed to protect you
turn toward your abuser with softness…
while turning away from your pain.


You Are Not Imagining This.

You are not “too sensitive.”
You are not “holding a grudge.”
You are not wrong for remembering what others are trying so hard to forget.

They may say it wasn’t that bad.
They may tell you to forgive for your own peace.
They may tell you it’s family, it’s complicated, it’s over now.

But they are not the one carrying the weight.
You are.

And you have every right to feel what you feel.


The Loneliness Is Real—and So Is Your Strength

It’s lonely to stand in truth when everyone else is dancing around it.
But please know this:

You are not broken for needing safety.
You are not bitter for needing distance.
You are not unforgiving for needing honesty.


You Deserve a Circle That Protects You

You deserve a circle that says:

  • “We believe you.”

  • “We’re sorry they hurt you.”

  • “You don’t have to pretend for our comfort.”

  • “We will not sit at the same table as your pain.”

Even if you’re still waiting for those people to show up—
you can be that circle for yourself right now.


đź’¬ Say This to Yourself:

  • “My truth is not too heavy. Their denial is too loud.”

  • “I don’t have to smile through harm to be the bigger person.”

  • “If love requires me to lie to myself, it’s not love.”

  • “I can love people from a distance and still love me up close.”

  • “I am allowed to heal, even if they’re not ready to reckon.”


You are not too much.
You are not alone.
And you are not wrong.

You are simply someone who chose truth,
in a world that often rewards the ones who hide it.

That is not weakness.
That is legacy work.

And I see you doing it with grace.

🕊️ Affirmations for When They Still Protect the Person Who Hurt You

  • I am not confused. I remember what happened. My body remembers too.

  • Their comfort will not cost me my healing. I choose me.

  • If they defend the one who harmed me, that is a mirror of them—not of me.

  • I am not here to make abuse easier for others to live with.

  • I release the need for their validation. My truth is sacred, even when spoken alone.

  • I am not cold. I am protecting what they refused to shield.

  • Their loyalty to harm will not change my loyalty to truth.

  • I may be grieving, but I am also rising.

  • I can outgrow people who stay small in the face of injustice.

  • I will not beg for a love that refuses to see my wounds. I am worthy of protection.


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Share if you feel safe and ready—your voice might be the lifeline someone else needs. And if you do share, remember to cite the messenger. Words carry legacy.