💌 Dear Strong Black Girl

Who had to grow up before she was ready.

You were praised for how grown you acted.
For how well you held things together.
For how much you helped, how quiet you stayed, how strong you were.

But no one ever stopped to ask: What did it cost you?

What did it cost you to parent yourself while others looked away?
To protect the ones who should have protected you?
To smile with a cracked spirit, to lead with a heavy heart, to make space for everyone but yourself?

Let me say what they didn’t:
You should have had the freedom to just be a child.
To cry without being told to toughen up.
To ask for help without being shamed.
To be held, not just leaned on.

But even if they didn’t give you that—you deserved it.
You still do.

And now, beloved, it’s time to unlearn what survival forced you to believe:
That love is earned through suffering.
That rest is laziness.
That being needed is the same as being valued.

No more.
You are not here to carry everything.
You are not here to fix everyone.
You are not here to be the adult in every room.

You are allowed to be soft.
To be cared for.
To not have all the answers.
To let someone hold you for once.

You are still worthy—even when you are not strong.
You are still beautiful—even when you fall apart.
You are still you—even when you finally let go.

And letting go?
That is not weakness.
That is healing.

Welcome to your softness, love.
You’ve earned it tenfold.

With endless gentleness,
A woman who sees the girl in you—fully, clearly, and with so much love.